Question by © ??? tori ???: Will you C/C this rewrite of my poem Grief, it might have a new title, I’m not sure?
Grief
by Victoria Tarrani
© 201100.27

Hot, salty tears flow through the deep blue notes.
I recall a time before yesterday,
when I took for granted I’d hear you say,
“Hand me my clothes then help me with my coat.”

I never knew aloneness felt this way:
parched, in spite of the water I swallow;
no hunger; food doesn’t reach this hallow;
moments, memories fade; no sleep on this day.

I know the sky is blue and grass is green,
but gray in a thousand hues is my sight,
it doesn’t matter if it’s day or night.
I reach for you; my arms fill with memories.

I took care of you, night and day, for years
all that is left, are pain filled thoughts and fears.
~

Best answer:

Answer by Fredric
I remember this poem I thought it was very good ,
your first stanza, I don’t think you changed
still a good poem

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

 

 

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