Question by Zatana100*: Is it the parents fault, the way we develop mentally?
I come from a middle class family and my mother always shouted at me and hit me with an item, stick or cooking spoon. She hit me so hard, that I fell from the chair. I was 7 years old only. I didn’t eat my food or my school grades were unsatisfactory. She left me alone in the street as I was 4 years old only.

I mentioned the incidents to her some years ago, as I was 48 years old, for the reason that I didn’t find a good man to marry. My marriage failed after a short time, as he let his financial problems out on me. My mother became very negative and said that I should not come back to her house.

I have a 17 year old son from this marriage. He now reminds me how badly I brought him up, the bad and unsatisfactory stories I told him and other incidents. He grow up without his father, as he left before my son was born. Now my son almost dictates me how I should open myself to the world and what kind of man I should marry and that I should not have another child.

He seems arrogant and wants to know everything better. I said that he should mind his own business and that I marry a man I feel in love with, with my preferred background. Further, that’s my decision on how many children I will have.

I am really sorry and I wish I can turn back the ‘clock’. I would act more assertively and study certain cultures before committing myself to new avenues. I also would apply for a new job, despite being a single mum of an hyperactive child.

I’ve been brought up in an unloving family environment. Always shouting and complaints and hate.

I love my son and always tell him how sorry I am. He should be grateful, as my mother will borrow him the fees for pilot training. He wants to become a commercial pilot. I collected all my effort to convince my mother that he’ll become a successful pilot and the high fees of such studies. I found a good flight school in Nevada, which we have visited already.

I don’t know why my son complained about the past. He recently quit college, applied for a job and hopes to get hired soon. Flight school he starts in December.

Best answer:

Answer by Athena
There are few “simple” answers to the questions you ask.

I would love to blame my parents for all my bumps in life, and never give any credit for the good things that have happened. “A son is seldom the metal of the father” to quote Homer.

Your parents can do everything right and you would still be what you are today.
Other great people have risen to their status BECAUSE they had bad parents.

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