Question by Lauren: I have had enough. Should I leave him?
My husband and I have been married for a little over 3 months now, but we have been together for 3 years. Our relationship has always had its ups and downs just like every other relationship but now its at the point where I don’t know what to do. We were in “marriage counseling” for about 7 months before we actually got married to try to resolve some of our problems (before anyone says “well you shouldn’t have married him anyway if you were in counseling that long” the last 3 months of the counseling he had made a real turn around). It seems that we fight all the time and last night I decided that I have had enough. These are just some of the things that we have discussed/fought over since we have been together:

1.) He is not romantic at all
2.) He doesn’t ever make dinner even when he doesn’t have to work on a particular day but I have too
3.) He won’t take out the trash
4.) If I ask him to do/fix something around the house that I can’t do he always puts it off until it gets
to a point where I either have to attempt to fix it or have my dad fix it.
5.) I have a bad hip and he always comes up with an excuse as to why he can’t massage my hip
after my hour drive home from work
6.) He won’t take care of our dogs properly
7.) He always seems to get mad if I ask him to pay all/part of a certain bill (even though I pay all
utilities and usually for the groceries)
8.) He won’t hold my hand or put his arm around me in public
9.) He won’t cuddle with me in bed because he says he gets too hot
10.) Anytime I ask him a question about something he can’t be serious (he always just smiles or
laughs when I try to talk to him)

This past weekend I had been at work all day on friday and offered to go by the grocery store to buy some groceries for our dinner. When I got home he asked if he was going to drive and I said yes, because I had just got done driving an hour home and didn’t want to have to drive to the grocery store. When we got home, instead of him making dinner (spaghetti which isn’t hard to make) he sat on the couch and watched TV which is what he was doing all day since he didn’t have to go to work. Then on Saturday I had to go into work for an in-service meeting. When I got up my dog had pooped and peed in her cage but there was no way I was going to have time to give her a bath and make it on time so I told him what she had done after I cleaned out her cage. When I got home around 3pm she was still in her cage covered in pee and poop. I asked him why he didn’t wash her and he said I hadn’t asked him. I shouldn’t have to ask him to wash the dog if she is dirty, especially since she was covered in pee. I hadn’t seen him all week because of his hours at work so I had told him that this past weekend I was looking forward to spending time with him. He decided that he wanted to go to a mud-bog and leave me at the house by myself with the dogs like I had been the whole week. It made me feel really rejected because I wanted to spend some time with him but it seems that he doesn’t want to spend time with me. Then last night at dinner he calls me “the devil of meanness” out of nowhere. After he said it he said he was just joking but I don’t see why you would say something like that even if you are joking. We weren’t even fighting. I am not a mean person but I think a 23 year old that is married has certain responsibilities and chores that he should do to help run the household. He says mean things to me like that all the time and thinks if he just apologizes it will make everything better. So, I just don’t know what to do anymore. He says that I am his everything and that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with someone that is constantly saying hurtful things to me and acting the way he does around the house. Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do?
I don’t nag him. He is an adult in a marriage so he should contribute 50/50. For a long time while he was out of work before we were married I paid for everything so now that he has a stable job he should help out too. And now that we are married they are “our” dogs not just mine or his. If the dog he had before we got married needed something I wouldn’t wait for him to ask me to do it. Its called taking responsibility and acting like a grown up.

Best answer:

Answer by Jebi
no dont leave him. find someone else use a bustard

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