Question by GodsChild: HELP! ALCOHOLIC + HEPATITIS C?
BEFORE YOU LOOK AT THE LENGTH AND QUICKLY EXIT OR SKIM THIS, PLEASE READ IT THOROUGHLY, I’M IN DESPERATE NEED OF YOUR HELP… PLEASE!

My mom has Hep C & is by such unfortunate and sad circumstances, also an alcoholic. She’s what they would call a “Functional Alcoholic,” she works, eats pretty healthy, a lot of fruits and vegitables, as well as drinks a lot of water. In other words, outside of her chronic alcohol use, her addiction, she’s pretty healthy- although she doesn’t exercise, and as a result from the drinking and lack of exercise has put on some weight, but is still reasonably thin.

Her drink of choice is Vodka. She claims, when drinking Vodka, this is when she gets carried away, but can control it when she drinks beer, for example. She mixes her drinks, and sips them slowly (mentioning this because i’ve read in some articles that this is a technique that alcoholics can use to try to control how much they drink)….but the fact still is: she drinks 7 days a week. Light consumption M-F, however enough to get a flush, or buzz, likely drunk by non-alcoholic standards. The weekends are another story. Friday-Sunday is an all-out binge. She’s told me she’s gone through an entire 1.75 JUG of vodka in one weekend… ALONE. Actually, she’s said that she’s done this many times, and it was a wake-up call and she stopped.

When she began drinking, many years ago, she would drink to relieve her anxiety, as many with anxiety disorders do. She was in treatment by age 16, got help, but started drinking again a few years later. She contracted Hepititis C when she was 24, she’s now 51, and has been an alcoholic the entire period she’s had Hep C. ALTHOUGH her alcoholism has gradually worsened throughout the years. Quite significantly. It wasn’t until about the past 5 years that the drinking became a daily ritual. It used to be, my whole life – adolescence, which ended about 6 years ago, she would only drink on teh weekends, and it wasn’t a weekend binge, it was limited to just the evening.

*IF I’M BORING YOU*

I’m giving details because i want to know what hope i can instill in her quitting drinking, given the specific circumstances i’m telling you, so please keep reading. Help someone who really wants help…me.

She won’t listen, and i have a strong feeling it’s due to hopelessness. She feels her liver isn’t perfect anyhow, along with her depression, trauma never recovered from (from childhood) she tried therapists throughout her life, and said the therapists never listened, or told her it was time to go in the middle of self-disclosure *basically she didnt find them helpful or she didn’t think they truly cared or both*. She is on an SSRI (anti-depressant) currently and thinks it’s working, but i keep telling her it WILL NOT work when you drink daily. The pill will cancel itself out. For all i know, the medication with the alcohol daily may be keeping her at an even keel.

LASTLY, it’s important to add the following:
She has tried to quit recently, twice. She went a few weeks without alcohol and said she was so God awful EXHAUSTED she couldn’t even hardly function. She said without the alcohol there is no longer anxiety present, and like i mentioned earlier, not facing the anxiety was what started the alcohol problems to begin, that, and the childhood trauma. But claims there is no more anxiety…Are theses signs of liver disease approaching or what’s up with that?

Based on what i’m telling you, what is some advice i can give to get her to cut down or stop drinking? I know the 12 steps, i know AA, i know rehab, i know out-paitient. She will not go to any, she sounded like she WOULD go to out-patient…but never did as her enforcers or reasons for going were not herself but the fact that she was hurting her kids and when we weren’t there to push her into it, never went….
The reasons for not going to Inpatient, AA, or the like is: she’s afraid of losing her job. I tell her what good is a job if you’re dead anyhow? She ignores this. In desperate need of wisdom from someone who KNOWS. Plz no garbage advice, this is a hard situation to deal with and i already know the problems assocaited with Hep C and Alc. so there’s no use in reinforcing that idea. I’ve tried reinforcing spirituality in her life, God… and that’s not helping…. I’ve tried amny things.

More importantly, i’ve tried telling her i’m not judging her, and that i love her and all i want is for her to not give up on herself.

Her current living situation is: ALONE. My stepfather recently passed from Alcoholism, just 5 months ago. This didn’t wake her up either.

Is she going to die from this disease? If she will enver stop drinking, how can i make my last years with her great & how can i let go the need to focus on her wellness?

Thanks for reading and i apologize for the
MAY I: Thank you for the feedback, I will absolutely pray as often as i can. This is great advice.

CANDACE: She is seeing someone regarding the Hep C., she gets yearly liver biopsies, and recently told me her last one came back 2X worse. This is alarming, but not surprising given her situation. You noted that you’re starting to feel this overwhelming urge to step-off. My advice: never give up. As long as you’re alive, keep trying to help your loved one until you’ve exhausted all options, that way if all fails, you will have peace of mind knowing you gave it your all. I’d love to talk regarding this, it’d be great to get some words of wisdom from someone who knows what it’s like. Being that i’m a young adult, i don’t have many friends that can really empathize with my situation. Nor would i want to burden those who can’t understand with things like this… bc the result isn’t going to be positive for anyone.

In this, let’s talk positives. Realities and positiives are one in the same,

Best answer:

Answer by may l
Hey,
Good luck with your situation. It is wonderfult o see someone that deeply cares for their parents. If you have ever watched Dr. Drew’s rehab show, you might know that it is hard for an addict to quit. The best advice I can give you is to pray for her. Beyond anything physical, which you have tried or which she refuses to partake in, God is always the healer. He can heal her alcoholism even though she is bound by it. Pray for her daily and every waking chance you get. This is the only cure I know will work. Good luck!

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The History of Harmony Foundation Inc – In 1969, a group of local (Estes Park year-round and summer residents) men discussed the need for helping alcoholics “dry-out” in Estes Park. These men were, themselves, recovering alcoholics, and instrumental in bringing AA to the community. Over 4 decades later, Harmony has an outstanding program, spanning five decades of providing successful treatment for alcoholics and drug addicts. Throughout its history, Harmony has shown itself to be adaptable to social, economic and moral trends both within the community at large, and the treatment community, specifically. Harmony continues to provide the tools needed for successful, ongoing recovery, utilizing evidence based best practices in an unparalleled mountain setting, at a moderate cost.

 

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