Question by dohnnyjepp: Have you ever fallen back in love with an ex?
My boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me last week. Everything seemed fine in our relationship, we got along great, had a ton of mutual friends, we never were controlling of one another, and we allowed one another “personal” time to go and do the things that we like to do individually. This break up came seemingly out of the blue, but he had said it’s been on his mind for the past 3 months or so when he started thinking that maybe our relationship was running its course. He said that he felt like we were moving in two different directions, and he just wasn’t sure that he felt the same way about me that he once did. He loved me, but wasn’t sure if he was in love with me. I asked him if this was a break up or break, and he seemed kinda unsure, but he said he didn’t want to call it a break because it wouldn’t be fair to me to have to wait around. He thought that we should take time to ourselves, be single and sort out the personal problems we had because he said neither one of us could do that while in the relationship. He also said he felt that I put too much of myself into the relationship, and that i defined myself by the relationship. What exactly does that mean?

He seemed like he wanted to keep the door open to possibly finding one another in the future, but I don’t know if I’m just projecting my hopes with that one. He said he truly still wanted to be friends, which I absolutely want. He said we need to go a few days- a week or so with no contact so that next time we talk, our heads will be in the right place. We live together, so we need to still discuss who gets what in the apartment, so this next conversation has to happen. I asked him what it was about me that made him fall in love with me. He said it was everything: personaliy, looks, sense of humor, everything. I asked him what has changed about me, and he said nothing. He said something is going on with him, and he doesn’t know why he’s feeling this way. Have you ever encountered a situation where a couple has fallen back in love after spending time apart? I just keep thinking that he’s going to wake up and realize he let go of the best thing that’s ever happened to him.

Also, I did something sneaky and snooped through his email, and found conversations with his friends. In one of them, I found out he made out with some chick at a bar, one night after he broke up with me! And he was telling another one that he needed to go out and sleep with as many “nameless chicks” he could find. After his last break up, he had told me that he slept around with anything that could move as a way to hide the pain he was feeling. I know guys deal with things in different ways, and he did not break up with me for another girl, but it’s upsetting that he’s thinking this way, and it makes me feel like I meant absolutely nothing to him. But a friend of mine told me that she saw him last night, and the first thing he said to her when he saw her was “Have you talked to her? And is she okay?” Is this sleeping around business a “coping” mechanism for some men?
Also, these doubts he’s had all started when he started going through a sort of financial crisis. Could this be clouding his judgement?

Best answer:

Answer by Gaylord
No I haven’t. You are one raging homo. Go to sleep and never wake up. Many thanks from the Fam! From Carol

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

 

 

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