Question by Lynn: Dealing With Dad Who Has Anger Management Issues?
… let’s just say he has MAJOR anxiety, OCD, paranoia, and anger management problems.
He will explode in anger every time there is a little disagreement. (E.g. I don’t hold the pencil his way, or I don’t use the right spoon to scoop rice)

For example, just a few minutes ago I was going to wash my hands in the kitchen. He said “No go wash your hands at the bathroom” and I thought “whatever, same thing” in my head. Then he suddenly started following me and SCREAMING at me, “WHY DON’T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU” Seriously his rage was SCARY, he was so LOUD, his tone honestly sounded like he wanted to smash my head on the counter or something.
(Funny story, he actually said that once… “YOU’RE SUCH A DISGRACEFUL CHILD, YOU DESERVE TO HAVE YOUR HEAD SMASHED AGAINST THE COUNTER”)
…..and yes unfortunately a stupid argument like this happens virtually every single day…

When I was little he was also the kind of person who would beat me up (as hard as he can, once my bum turned purple) when he wanted me to stop crying. He also swears/screams a LOT at my mom, and once he made her hands and feet bleed a lot because he was trying to force her to have another baby or something (I’m not clear with the details).

It’s impossible to reason with him, too. If he hears ANYTHING he doesn’t want to hear, he’ll start repeatedly saying “SHUT UP.” (If I don’t stop talking then he will start beating me.) So as you can see, *****communication is COMPLETELY ineffective*****. Yes, even when he’s in a good mood, his mood will turn sour in seconds.
(as a result I actually started yelling back at him, so yes arguments are partially my fault, but seriously he’s so frustrating, he wouldn’t ever listen to what I have to say…)

My mom actually really wants a divorce, but she’s choosing to wait until after I graduate. We did contemplate calling the police a few times, but my mom decided against it, since if my dad went to jail then it would be inconvenient to take care of my little sister (since I still have high school and my mom works).

His anger goes off all crazy like that EVERY SINGLE DAY, about 75% of the time you talk to him basically. It really really makes *everyone* in this family insane, he’s crazy. Luckily he doesn’t swear at my sister or me, and hitting stopped (for the MOST part), but he still screams at, insults, belittles, and threatens us. Also he has the DIRTIEST mouth with my mom, such a great collection of Chinese swear words (we’re chinese).

So can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with someone like him?

PS please don’t say “See a counselor” or “call the child abuse hotline” or whatever. & This isn’t even the whole story, my dad always thinks my mom’s cheating on him for NO apparent reason (except his own paranoia), it drives HER nuts as well. All I can say is ugh…
(& sorry for using caps a lot, ironic how his anger makes me really angry too.. sorry I can’t help it)
Also forgot to add, he’s in denial of his anger issues lol… he says his anger is all completely my fault, because I’m always “against him”…. (when he simply can’t deal with a simple disagreement over some petty matter sigh..)

Best answer:

Answer by Uncle Joe
I would beat the shit out of him to show him I mean business but if you can’t get a bat and hit his shins. Get a stick and whip him. Buy a BB gun and every time he starts acting up at you aim at him, if he continues shoot him. Don’t get a powerful one though. Just like a 250 fps or something

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