Question by iBelieve in TrueLove: Is it normal to feel “grief” about this?
It’s a “duh!” – no brainer question. I went to speak to a counselor today to talk more about dealing with anxiety/stress. Last week we covered more of learning/anxiety and now, I wanted to talk with her on how to deal with stress with people. My colleagues are too dependent on me (don’t know why) and I’m not even their doormat; it’s been stressful for me. We went from examining relationships with them, to friends in my past, to relationships I’ve had in my past. We someone got into the topic of my ex -boyfriend, whom I haven’t been in relationship since a bit over a year ago. It was short lived and I’m more than great about myself and what had happened. I’m cordial with him if I see him and that was a part of my life that seemed so long ago.

My counselor went in deeper and out of NOWHERE, i started bawling. My ex….we were intimate…and he was drunk… and he was my “first”, I was 23. I know I’m over the situation, him, and what had happened but I did NOT expect to bawl about it nor the reaction and hurt I was feeling when it just came out. I don’t want to be a bitter person and hold resentment but my counselor said it’s “moments of grief” I’ll feel bc it’s something I had pride in and kept it in so long… and he “robbed” something so precious… and how he wasn’t “there”, which made me cry even more. Before you make any judgements, I will say he’s a nice guy. There was no typical “hit it and quit it”, believe me. The thing is, no one knows whenever he’s drunk – it’s hard to tell. I didn’t feel forced to do it and from what I remember, he was completely alert, aware, and oriented – just more confident with himself and happy. Anyhoo, I was not expecting for me to go in there and cry AND especially (out of all the things I would cry about) this topic. Out of nowhere. I wasn’t expecting that at all… will I be okay?
(Of course, no one’s going to come in my life and sweep it all away. I get that. But will I be able to trust again and be close w. someone like that, again?)

Best answer:

Answer by Sugar
Yes, it’s very normal.

What do you think? Answer below!

 

 

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